This Year Marks A Decade Of My Life, I Will Never Forget. Chapter Six

Friends…..again?

 

I went over to Natalie’s three years after our big fight, and about 7 Months after Paige passed away. We cried, we both apologized. It was great to see her after three years.

We took time, and caught up on what we missed in each others lives. She had already known about Ashley and I losing Paige. Natalie hung out with another old good friend of mine, Abra. Who had come to the funeral.

When I left Natalie’s I felt good. I did however, find it very surprising on how forgiving and forth coming, and apologetic she was. If there is one thing I know about Natalie, it’s that she is not a very forgiving person. But I pushed that thought aside, and decided to just be happy to be friends again. After all, I did miss her….a lot.

A couple of months later, Ashley and I were pregnant again. Emotions and fears were running high. Worrying that we would lose another baby.

Throughout my pregnancy, I would confide in Natalie about how scared I was. She would listen, and reassure me. And there were times, that she would confide in me, about how unhappy she was in her marriage. She would tell about plans she had to leave. And all the times, that she would tell me things about her marriage, I never talked to her about my marriage with Ashley. For one, we were good, and I had no plans on leaving him. I thought it would just be wrong for me to sit there and tell her how I was happy with my Husband. So, I kept my mouth shut, and just listened to her, and tried to give her advice.

As far as my pregnancy was going; things were tough sometimes. Emotionally, and mentally. The fear of losing another baby, was so strong.

My Doctor sent me to Credit Valley Hospital. There they have a High Risk clinic, and doctors who are more prepared for baby and delivery emergencies (where I should have been sent with the pregnancy before). This calmed my nerves a lot. To know that you and your baby are in good hands, after a bad situation with your last pregnancy, feels great.

I had the same high blood pressure, but no medication for it was needed. I also got the Gestational diabetes again, but I was more educated this time around. Thanks to Credit Valley Hospital. I had the hot itchy feet again, but no blisters this time. I also learned how to get the itching to calm down.  And I can very happily say… NO Pre-Eclampsia this time.

At 37 weeks, our little baby Zoey was delivered but c-section. She was healthy, and we were so re-leaved. A very happy moment for us.

About 3 to 4 months after Zoey was born. Things with Natalie started to change again. She started to ignore my texts and Facebook messages, and I caught her lying to me. Finally I had had enough. When we became friends again, we both agreed to talk to each other if there was a problem. Holding it in, is what ruined our friendship the last time. So, I confronted her. She than proceeded to tell me that she was to busy. And that I needed to stop being selfish. I responded to her by saying, that expecting a friend to return a text message tor a message on Facebook isn’t selfish. Friends don’t ignore friends. I decided at that moment to end out friendship for good. We wished each other the best, and that was that. We haven’t spoken since.

I still miss being friends with Natalie. I think though, I miss what our friendship used to be, not what it had become. We grew into different women, with different morals. I truly do wish her all the best. I really hope that she can find happiness.

 

To Be Continued……..

 

 

What’s the cost for being lazy?

Since having baby number three, I have been on the quest of getting my health back. I have found it harder and harder to get into “before baby” shape with every baby. For me, my motivation comes and goes. My weight has gone up and down, and I am someone who has to work hard at it. I feel I am finally at in a good place and I am finding it easier to stay motivated.  I do feel sometimes that I am surrounded by lazy people. People who will find any excuse they can find, not to exercise. They say “Well, I don’t have time”. I say make the time.

Society is getting bigger and I am hearing a lot of people thinking that it ok to be big. Some women are saying ” I love myself”. Well, you can go to far with being to big and being to small. Just because someone is thin, does not mean that they are healthy. Ever hear of something called skinny fat? So don’t think I am being one-sided here.

To me, loving yourself means taking care of your body as well as loving who you are. I agree that women should have curves, but at what are the consequences to no exercise?

I had high blood pressure and gestational diabetes, with my last two pregnancies. I am currently on high blood pressure medication and have been told that I am pre-diabeteic. My goal is to lower my blood pressure and to be taken off medication, and prolong getting diabetes for as long as I can. And with my efforts to improve the health of my insides, I will lose weight.

I guess what I am trying to say is, that you should love yourself, but sitting on your ass and doing nothing is not loving yourself. Because when you love yourself, you take care of your health. Thin or fat we all need to be getting out there and be more active. I choose to exercise, and I do love myself. My goal is to improve my health, because that is what it comes down to. I love my curves and want to keep them. The number on the scale does not matter to me, it’s how I feel on the inside. I dare all of you to make a 100% effort into working out for one week. I bet you will feel awesome.

I don’t know about you, but I want to live for many, many more years!

27 Weeks!

Last week of second trimester. Now this is were all the pregnancy fun begins! Yeah……that was sarcasm.

This week I am having a growth ultrasound done. We will find out if our little girl is already getting bigger than normal because of Gestational Diabetes.

Okay, so my target blood sugar before a meal is 5.5 and my target 1 hour after a meal is 7.0 Tonight before supper my blood sugar was 7.3, so it was high, and usually if your number is high before a meal than it will be high after the meal. Well, tonight 1 hour after supper my blood sugar was 6.9 ?????? No idea what happened there, but hey it’s a good thing. My blood sugars are where they are supposed to be tonight. That, makes me happy.

Today’s weather has caused my feet and ankles to swell. The thermometer at my house read 30 degrees C. It was pretty humid today. My feet do not like the heat and humidity!

Sleep is still good, though I am starting to feel like I need a nap everyday again. Just another reminder of the last trimester sneaking up.

I have been doing good with saying no to a lot of cravings. I do well with eating healthy, it’s the eating healthy with GD that I find hard. No foods gross me out.

10 weeks to go! I am very excited. I am also looking forward to either going a long time before another pregnancy or never being pregnant again. That is something we will have to discuss in the future. I am really looking forward to having my body back to myself and not being pregnant. I love the baby part, I just hate every thing else that comes along with it.

Belly is growing, and if you read my last blog you will have read about all the rude people I have been coming across. I will not be surprised if I tell someone to Fuck off! As the hot weather goes on I will be one tired, swollen cranky pregnant lady.

You Know You’re Pregnant When…..

You know your pregnant when…..

The temperature in your house is 15c and you are perfectly comfortable.

You have to pee every hour on the hour.

When you have a graving for a specific food, it’s like you can taste the craving in your mouth and sometimes the bad cravings will not go away unless you give in.

No one would dare to come in between you and your food (unless they know what`s good for them)

You need to nap for most of the days during the 40 weeks of pregnancy (most of those days being in the first and third trimester)

You get lower back pains, swollen feet/ankles, constipation, hemorrhoids, sore breasts, stretch marks, acid re-flux, possibility of high blood pressure, possibility of gestational diabetes, acne, gas, itchy skin and did I mention acid re-flux

You get strangers touching your belly, like they think that they are actually touching the baby.

You get rude people telling you that you look like you are about to burst. ( like your self-esteem isn’t low enough)

Towards the end of a pregnancy, shaving your legs and tying your shoes is a huge success.

Getting comfortable while sleeping becomes almost impossible.

You either want  lots of sex or absolutely none at all.

You feel fat, tired, hungry, cranky and worried all at the same time.

Towards the end of your pregnancy bending down and getting back up is a huge success.

MOOD SWINGS!

Crying can sometimes be a daily event, followed shortly after by anything else.

Your poor Husband takes a lot of blame for how you are feeling.

Related articles

• Learning to Love Your Pregnant Body! – Health and Well-being (everydayfamily.com)
• If Men get pregnant… (jalvayuvihar.wordpress.com)
• Stages Of Pregnancy (babyassist.wordpress.com)